Hippies on a Beach

The sound of waves roared in my ears. Rough sand greeted the pores on my soft hands. The sun beamed down radiantly. I open my eyes. The Sky burned brightly in my delicate retina. The sky was perfect except for a brown curl that bobbed in the wind. 

What is that?... Oh it’s my hair, I thought relaxing, taking in the glorious beach that I lay on. Hold on a minute. I don’t have brown, curly hair. I sat up as my hand shot up to my head.

I have an afro. Then I saw my hand. I’ve never been shocked by the sight of my hand before but I was pretty darned astonished when I saw it.

Shut the front door, I thought. My hands are black. I’m black! I stood up and examined my body. That’s when I noticed my clothes. My shorts were a strange plaid color and would not have been acceptable in most public schools and my shirt was really really tight, showing off my midriff. A peace symbol sat on a necklace raised on my chest.

I screamed. My voice was high. But that was the last of my problems. I looked at what the peace symbol was on. No way, I thought, those aren’t…

I slowly reached one hand up and touched my chest. No! They were. I reached the other hand up to touch.

AGH! I had Boobs!!!

 I ran down the beach, trying to leave them behind but they stayed right where they were.

“What the heck is going on?” I yelled. I grasped my mouth. My voice was really high.

“Hello,” I tried again. Yup, still as high as a soprano’s.

I’m a black woman.

“Hey, Tina.” I heard a voice say. I turned around just as a male hippie tried to kiss me. I punched him the mouth.

“Get away!” I heard myself say.

“Whoa, chill out Tina,” the hippie said, not even fazed by my right hook. He sank down into the sand taking a sip from the bottle of alcohol that he had in his right hand.

“Do I know you,” I asked in my high voice.

“Yeah, we’re like totally together right now man.”

This guy was definitely on something.

Then things got really trippy. The sky turned purple all of a sudden and a strange man that resembled Buddha floated around strumming a guitar and singing: “Lucy in the sky with diamonds…”

…

 Am I on drugs?, I thought. Buddha man winked at me.

I slapped myself really hard across the face.

I jumped up from my computer chair and my ipod dangled down from my ears. I was back in the office of my house. I spread my hands out in front on me.

White.

I clenched my chest.

Flat.

Oh praise Zeus I was a white boy again. I pulled out the earphones, which blared the sounds of ocean waves and sank back down into my computer chair. I looked down at my History book which showed a hippie march, and sure enough Tina marched in the first row.

I always knew there was a black woman inside of me.